३ येअर्स एंड स्टील सोबर

I'm thankful to be sober but haven't quite got it all figured out.

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Frontline has a documentary called "The Mormons.". I started watching
it on line yesterday. The interesting thing is that the LDS church
gave its assistance instead of blocking the project as it normally
does. I really want to visit Utah now.

My first wife

What's the difference between standing up for yourself and being a prideful dick?  It seems like either way it ends up in an arguement.  I suppose the key is whether or not there are loving intentions, which I certainly don't always have.  So somehow I went from being a hero for baking cookies with the kids to winning this week's bad husband award (a very prestigious honor).

 

I started reading "Under The Banner of Heaven".  So now when I contemplate the best way to approach my marriage I think, WWURD?

 

(what would Uncle Rulon do)?

The Heavenly Father believes in the purity of plural marriage.

We've been watching the HBO show Big Love this week. It is so good.
It focuses on a polygamist family in Utah. Wow. I have trouble
enough with one wife, much less three.

Waste it. Spend it. Invest it.

The kids and I went to chuch this morning, as we do most Sundays. I went in with a bad attitude mostly because because I wasn't feeling well. As the service started I was wondering what I was doing there. Just when I was considering sneaking out to take a walk, a mother and daughter did a duet that was so beautiful I almost cried. Later the pastor spoke about the three options we have for what we can do with life: Waste it. Spend it. Invest it. I've done a lot of wasting and spending but not enough investing. So despite my intention to sleep through the service I went away inspired and realizing I really need to get my shit together and start giving something back. I need to shift my focus from 99% about me and my problems to 99% on helping others. That was clearly the intent because as we left the sanctuary there were tables set up displaying all sorts of volunteer opportunities. My daughter, who already drank the Kool-Aid, somehow talked me into joining the choir. I was actually thinking more about something like taking meetings into to detox or getting on a speaker list. But I suppose being a positive example to my kids is a good start.

I'm planning to run in the Torchlight 5k tomorrow. It has been a long time since I've run in an organized event. The last one was back in 2000 when I ran the Twin Cities Marathon. I was in much better running shape then. That was before I started smoking and boozing again. Slowly but surely though I'm getting back into form.